Why "Gray Divorce" is on the Rise: What Couples Over 60 Need to Know About Relationship Health

While overall divorce rates in the U.S. have declined in recent decades, one demographic is seeing a surprising trend in the opposite direction: older adults. The phenomenon, often referred to as “gray divorce,” involves couples aged 60 and above choosing to end long-term marriages. Whether it’s due to increased longevity, shifting social norms, or greater financial independence—especially among women—gray divorce is a reality many couples are now facing. At Thrive for Life Counseling, we offer virtual therapy for couples, including affordable online counseling for individuals navigating life transitions like divorce, retirement, or an empty nest. If you're considering therapy for anxiety, depression, or relationship distress, especially later in life, virtual therapy can provide convenient and compassionate support from the comfort of your home.

In recent decades, U.S. divorce rates have steadily declined. According to the CDC, 955,000 divorces or annulments occurred in 2002. By 2022, that number had dropped to 673,989. The sharpest dip happened during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, when divorce rates hit historic lows.

One reason for this decline is that fewer people are getting married in the first place. Many are choosing long-term cohabitation or maintaining committed relationships without formalizing them through marriage. This trend spans age groups, including older adults who may opt to “live apart together” or avoid remarrying after widowhood or previous divorce. With today’s greater financial autonomy, especially among women, marriage is no longer a prerequisite for stability or independence.

Yet, one age group is experiencing a growing trend in divorce: those aged 65 and older. In 2022, this age group had a divorce rate of 15%, nearly triple what it was in the 1990s. This is what researchers and therapists now refer to as “gray divorce.”

What’s fueling the rise in gray divorce? For one, people are living longer. With increased life expectancy, individuals are less inclined to spend decades in unfulfilling or unhappy marriages. There's also more optimism among older adults that they can find love again later in life. New romantic relationships are common across all stages of adulthood—including after divorce.

Interestingly, women initiate the majority of gray divorces. Common reasons include emotional, verbal, or physical abuse, but many women are also simply less willing to remain in unsatisfying relationships. Today’s older women are more likely to have college degrees, established careers, and independent financial resources. This generation, unlike those in the 1970s or '80s, isn’t as reliant on marriage for financial security, allowing them the confidence to pursue divorce when necessary.

Many couples postpone divorce “until the kids are grown,” but research shows that staying in conflict-heavy relationships can be harmful to both partners and their children. For some families, separation brings a sense of peace, and many adult children report relief after their parents split. In earlier decades, social norms and legal constraints made divorce far more difficult. But in today’s world, individual satisfaction and emotional well-being are prioritized.

If you are in a long-term relationship and feeling dissatisfied, online therapy or couples counseling online can help. According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT), nearly 90% of clients report emotional health improvements after therapy. Over 75% of couples in marriage therapy or family therapy say their relationship improved as a result.

Virtual therapy for counseling is not only more accepted today—it’s also more accessible. Many insurance plans and Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) now cover affordable online counseling, making it easier for couples to be proactive about building healthy communication and stronger emotional connections.

Whether you're navigating the challenges of a gray divorce, seeking therapy for anxiety or depression, or looking to strengthen your relationship through couples counseling online, Thrive for Life Counseling is here to help. Our licensed therapists offer 100% virtual therapy for counseling via secure video or phone, allowing you to receive high-quality care from the comfort of your own home. We provide services to clients located in Indiana, Illinois, Florida, Missouri, and New Jersey—and we accept most major insurance plans. If you're ready to take the next step toward healing, growth, or connection, contact us today to schedule a free consultation or book an appointment.

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