A Couples Therapist's Favorite Books for Clients & Professionals

As a licensed marriage and family therapist with over 25 years of experience, I've found that certain books can be invaluable resources for both clients and fellow professionals. These books not only enhance therapeutic work but also offer practical tools and insights that clients can apply outside of sessions. Whether you're a client looking to deepen your understanding of personal challenges or a therapist seeking to expand your knowledge, the following list of my favorite therapy books is a great place to start. Each of these books has proven to be a helpful companion on the journey toward healing, growth, and stronger relationships. You should be able to find all of these books on Amazon or at your local library.  Some of these books are also available in audio form.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work:  A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert by John Gottman and Nan Silver.  

A New York Times Best-Seller!  An excellent book for couples and therapists alike.  It is the perfect adjunct to couples therapy and offers a lot of great homework assignments at the end of each chapter.  In this book you will find information on love maps, fondness and admiration, turning toward each other, accepting influence, solvable v perpetual problems, gridlock and creating shared meaning.

NOT “Just Friends”:  Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity by Shirley Glass and Jean Copock Staeheli.  

A necessary read for couples healing from the trauma of infidelity and the therapists who assist in facilitating the healing.  This book covers discovery, ambivalence about staying, obsessing, rebuilding trust, forgiveness moving forward and healing alone.

After the Affair:  Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful by Janis Abrahams Spring and Michael Spring.  

A great book for clients and therapists.  The name says it all.  The chapters cover normal feelings, ambivalence and how to rebuild.

How Can I Forgive You?  The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To by Janis Abrahams Spring and Michael Spring.  

A great addition to therapy for anyone on the journey to forgiveness…and for the therapist who is on that journey with the client.  The book breaks down cheap forgiveness, refusing to forgive, acceptance and genuine forgiveness.

The Intentional Family:  Simple Rituals to Strengthen Family Ties by William J. Doherty.  

It is an excellent book for biological parents and step-parents.  The contents of the book covers being intentional about creating a bonded and blended family, family rituals, holidays, couple rituals, rites of passage in the family, etc.

Helping Couples on the Brink of Divorce: Discernment Counseling for Troubled Relationships by William J. Doherty and Steven M. Harris.  

An excellent book for therapists on how to help their clients make the difficult decision to divorce…or not.  The book provides information on what happens before therapy actually starts, session protocol, when there has been an affair, when feelings are no longer present, managing critical incidents and how to build a practice in discernment counseling.

The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene  

A necessary book for understanding difficult behavior for parents.  The book talks about the terrible twos, inflexibility, explosiveness, the truth about consequences, corrective lenses, brain chemistry, family matters, and so much more.

'It Will Never Happen to Me!' Children of Alcoholics: As Youngsters - Adolescents - Adults by Claudia Black.  

A powerful book for adult children of alcoholics.  The book covers roles, the don’t talk-don’t trust-don’t feel mantra, the child within the home, the adult child, family violence and resources.

On Grief and Grieving:  Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler.  

This is a modern adaptation of the classic On Death and Dying book.  The book explores the 5 stages of grief, special circumstances around grief (children, disasters, suicide, sudden death) and so much more.

An Introduction to Marriage and Family Therapy by Joe Wetchler and Lorna Hecker.  

A must for social workers and mental health counselors who want to practice couples therapy or family therapy.  This book covers the history of marriage and family therapy, general systems theory, cybernetics, structural family therapy, strategic family therapy, milan systemic therapy, the collaborative language-based models of family therapy, experiential approaches to family therapy, cognitive-based therapies for couples and families, transgenerational family therapies, communication training, marriage enrichment, premarital counseling, sexual dysfunctions, sex therapy, contextual issues, ethical issues, legal issues and professional issues.

Conclusion

Books can be powerful tools in the therapeutic process, offering guidance, support, and new perspectives. Whether you're navigating a personal challenge or looking to enhance your professional practice, the titles I've shared here have the potential to make a meaningful impact. I encourage you to explore these resources and see how they can contribute to your journey. Remember, while books can provide valuable insights, they are most effective when combined with the personalized support of therapy. At Thrive for Life Counseling, we're here to help you on your path to wellness and growth, wherever you are in Indiana, Illinois, or Florida.

Marilyn Verbiscer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Thrive for Life Counseling, a 100% virtual therapy practice seeing clients in Illinois, Indiana, Florida.  As a Level 3 Gottman Trained therapist, Marilyn is well equipped to help couples navigate relationship challenges.